....

Definitions.....

"You been drinking too much these days " shouted his mom over the phone. Sethu just smiled. His mother throws temper tantrums about his lifestyle so often that he got used to it.

"Every Friday you drink saying that it’s a weekend, then there are promotion parties, client parties, and what not  ..." she continued.

"Okay Mom, bye-bye." he interrupted "Will call you tomorrow” and cuts the call.

He walked back to the party to where his friends sat sipping their vodka.

Martin:"Your mom huh? You told her again"

Sethu: "Yeah  ...I see no point in hiding the truth"

Amal: "And you see no point in listening to her”

Sethu: "She's one big drama queen!!!"

Martin: "Some women just don’t understand things”

Amal: "Drinking once in a while is okay, but you do it too often"

Martin: "Just shut up will ya!! Listen, Sethu this is the age when you should enjoy. So do whatever you want, because once you’re old, you won’t be able to enjoy even if you want to. When I was your age, I did the same. Now I am happy that I enjoyed those days"

Amal :"You are still doing it ,else you won't be here with us tonight"

Martin:"But you see..."

"Listen everybody” announced the DJ "This is the last song for tonight. So hop on and rock the dance floor".

Amal stood up and asked "Aren't you guys coming ??" .

Sethu just smiled. Martin replied "I'm too old for it kid!!"

"Okay then" said Amal and jogged towards the laser lights. Everyone was on dance floor. Well, everyone except two obese men sitting at the corner table.

The DJ played a remix. People roared and danced along. Martin started pouring more into his glass while Sethu sat watching Amal dance. Sethu always wondered why he hangs out with Amal. They were too different, despite being of the same age. Amal was a soft spoken heath conscious guy with an athletic build. Sethu was just the opposite, a cute plum careless guy.  He loved to dance, but was scared of being laughed at. Last month, a friend uploaded a hilarious video of Sethu dancing at his apartment. Talks about it went around for weeks at the office. He was embarrassed, but smiled as if he didn’t care. Martin was the only one who didn't laugh at him. Martin and Sethu were almost alike despite the fact that Martin was older, and with more than a decade of experience in the industry. Both were good performers career-wise and wished to enjoy life to the fullest. They defined enjoyment in 3 ways-drinking, eating and buying ultra expensive things to show off.

The music came to a halt. People cheered and went back to their seats.

 “It’s almost midnight” said Amal as he walked back.

 Martin: “Yeah yeah  ... we need to leave. My wife will start calling now.”

Sethu: “And we have a client call tomorrow morning at 10. My bike is still at the workshop.so…”

 Martin:” Fine, I’ll come to your place at 8:30.”

The next day at 8:15, Sethu reached the main gate of his flat. Martin has the habit of being early for everything. If Martin says “at 10”, his subordinates know that it means “at 9:30”. So Sethu was expecting Martin to be waiting there at the main gate. But, the only one at the gate was the flat’s security. “May be there is a traffic block somewhere” Sethu thought.

So,  Sethu stood at the gate watching the residents from the nearby women’s hostel walking to their colleges. As minutes flew by , more and more college-goers filled the road. “Colleges start too early these days “he told the security guard. “So many girls leaving so early”. “It’s already 9, Sir, they are leaving on time” came the reply.

Sethu checked his watch. “What the fuck!! where is Martin??? “. He dialed Martin’s number. The phone rang but no one picked up. Sethu was sure that Martin would come. Martin always does whatever he says he’ll do. “Can the traffic block be that big?...”thought the young man “May be he slept off …na.. not Martin.. he’s serious when it comes to work ..May be he forgot “. He dialed again. Still no response.

Six miss calls later, at around 9 :15 , Sethu called a cab and left for office. Fortunately he reached in time for the conference, but unfortunately Martin was not there in his seat.

“Even though one of our teammates is not here, we must start the meeting now “explained the Project Manager to the client“the agenda of ……”

Martin’s absence bothered Sethu. It felt strange. Martin never misses calls .Sethu sat there uninvolved. The Project Manager caught him and gestured him to leave.

 “Must be yesterday’s hangover”  whispered one of the teammates. Sethu just smiled even though he wanted to give a good reply.

 “You can leave if you wish to do so “said the Project Manager.

As soon as he got out, he dialed Martin’s number again; still no response. Then dialed Martin’s wife’s number, again the phone rang with no response. He dialed again and this time someone picked up.

“Hello” said a soft child-like voice. Sethu knew that it was Martin’s 6 year old son.

Sethu: “Hello, Steve, is that you? Where is papa?”

Steve: “Papa had chest pain at breakfast .Then Papa fainted. We are at Doctor Uncle’s place.”

Sethu: “Is your mommy there? Give the phone to her...”

Steve:” Mommy is crying. She is not taking the phone. Doctor Uncle is telling her not to cry. Mommy still crying and.. “. The phone got disconnected. Sethu dialed again, but failed to get the connection.

 “What did Steve mean by fainting? Was Steve describing a heart attack??” he thought and a shiver ran through his body” Was Martin dead or just unconscious??Martin is too young to have a heart attack .He’s only 33”

He took a cab and went to the hospital where Martin’s cousin worked.  “Steve mentioned ‘Doctor Uncle’. He must have meant Martin’s cousin”

Sethu started sweating despite it being a cool winter morning. “He can’t die so young.” thought Sethu” His son is only six. Wife is jobless and he’s the only son of his parents. He can’t die so young. They are rich, but wealth can’t replace a dad, a son and a husband. Or maybe I misunderstood. May be Steve was just describing a chest pain. May be he fainted because of some silly small illness. “

Sethu dialed Martin’s wife’s number. It didn’t even ring. He called the hospital reception and enquired. They connected his call to the doctor’s phone.

“Yes Sethu, he is alright for the time being” said the doctor “but I don’t think he’ll survive another stroke. Well, I knew something like this would crop up one day. I had advised him a million times to change his habits. He never listened. He chose this fate “Sethu started sweating more.

Minutes later,  as he climbed the stairs to reach the room where Martin was admitted ,  he meet Martin’s wife. She hated Sethu and he knew it.

“My husband “she once told him “has become more careless and irresponsible after meeting you”. 

She starred at him. Sethu felt bad.“I am sorry “he said

“Three words are not going to mend all what you have done” she replied .

He felt angry and sad at the same time. “Why is she blaming me?” he thought “Am I the only one responsible”

 “Tell me what I should do. Should I jump from this building? Will that make you happy? “he asked ”You are talking as if I tried to kill him. I was being his good friend. I wanted him to be happy that’s all “

“If you were his good friend you should have discouraged him. If he dies, you’ll just loose a friend. You’ll get many other friends. But my son will lose his dad. And that can never be replaced “

Silence prevailed for a few minutes. Then she spoke again.

“The doctors told me that he needs a surgery soon. There is only a small chance that he will survive. That too only if he follows the proper diet and have his tablets in time. But he won’t listen. Not to me nor to the doctor. Can’t you convince him??  You are his best friend, right?? “

“I promise you, sister, I will do my best “Sethu replied and walked into Martin’s room.

Martin was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling. He looked sideways when he heard the footsteps.

“Sethu …” said Martin with a big smile. “Thank God that you are here. I hope you heard the news. I almost died today morning. Now they are planning to do a surgery. There is only a small chance that I will survive. That too only if I follow the proper diet and have my tablets in time. But even that won’t guarantee that I will survive. I am probably going to die. So I was thinking Sethu, if these are my last few days, shouldn’t I be enjoying them? Go bring me some beef roast, poorotta and a bottle rum. Can’t you do that? You are my best friend, right?? “

“Friend”. That six letter word can be defined in six hundred different ways. Now it is left for Sethu to decide how he should define that word.

Rearranged marriage !!

For her parents she was just a 21 year old kid. But the rest of the world saw her as a 21 year old woman. She has just finished college and is looking forward to the glorious new era of her life-The work era. She's all excited about moving to new metros far from home ,earning her living , blasting with friends and so on. She had jotted down a long list of dreams in her diary that ranged from "scuba diving " to "winning Booker prize". Within a few months she will join the MNC where she had been placed and soon the adventurous life that she dreams about would begin.Well , her life has always been adventurous in every sense for she was one of those girls who was not scared of the cynics.

But then on one fine Sunday morning , a 60 year old white bearded man visits her home. She was informed that  "He's a close relative; her dad's maternal cousin's paternal uncle's brother-in-law's cousin's son". After a tea and friendly chat about unworthy topics he puts in the reason for his visit . "I heard that She is 21 ," he started ....Wait ..Wait ...Wait...I have been using the term "She" a bit too much and its turning kinda monotonous ...so let me give her a name ....hmm....how about "Sreedevi" ...Okay her name is "Sreedevi" from now on...so as I was saying the uncle puts in the reason for his visit . He says "I heard that Sreedevi is 21 .X , Y and Z told that she is a good girl .... My elder son is turning 28 ..he's an engineer working at blah blah blah blah..."  

That was just a humble beginning. More "arranged" proposals followed . Her parents rejected them all at first , but slowly a fear creep-ed in..."She's 21 after all". 

  What confused Sreedevi the most was the fact that these Uncle's and Aunts who came up with the proposals barely knew her. They knew her name ,age ,what she looked like ,her caste etc. But Sreedevi is more than just these meaningless materialistic details. 

Weeks later one day, her dad came home with a photograph. A highly Photoshop-ed photo of an engineer working in a Dubai oil company , 11 lakhs per annum salary and his parents stay in the same neighborhood where Sreedevi's family lives. "Horoscope's match perfectly " he said " The groom and his family will visit us on 19th September "

The dawn of 19th September was a beautiful one. But Sreedevi had neither the time nor the mood to watch the beauty of the sky as she walked towards the temple. She was happy and confused at the same time. Happy because  she is gonna meet a man who might turn out to be her life partner. Confused because it sounds so strange .Two people ,who barely know each other despite being natives of the same city , is gonna meet today to decide whether they wanna spend the rest of their lives together.

 As she walked towards the temple, she noticed a man at the entrance of the temple. A tall man with a medium build clad in white mundu and blue shirt engaged in the task of removing his sandals. Well that wasn't an unusual site in front of the temples , sandals were not allowed inside temples. What was unusual was that the man seemed very familiar, but she failed to recognize who he was. In the next second, his eyes fell upon her. He looked surprised at first and then smiled. And then Sreedevi realized that this was the man in that photo , this was her would-be groom. His complexion looked much more fair and hair more tidy in the photograph. He looked cute in real life too,but well in the photo he was 10 times cuter ."Photoshop should banned " she said to herself.

He walked upto her and said "Hi ..err...its a pleasant surprise to meet you here. " 
Sreedevi did not speak , she simply stared at him for a few seconds and then looked around. 
He spoke again to get rid of the silence "So ..hmm..do you come here everyday ..i mean to the temple ".. 
"No "replied Sreedevi...and the silence continued. 
"Don't you have anything to say " he asked "Were you planning to keep quiet when i come to see you "  
" Well you look very different from the photo" Sreedevi replied .
He frowned and replied "Well yes , the photo was edited a bit ".. Wait , he deserve a name doesnt ,he ??..hmm .."Shasi" would suit him well ...Okay so here is the rest of the conversation between "Shasi" and "Sreedevi".

Shasi : "Well the photo was edited a bit"
Sreedevi: "Not just a bit "
Shasi :"Oh well , is that a big problem for you. I know that I'm not a Hrithik Roshan"
Sreedevi: "Well I'm not an Aiswarya Rai either. Your cute enough for me"
Shasi(smiling) : "Thanks for the compliment"
Sreedevi :" It wasn't a compliment , just a fact. I dont judge men by looks."
Shasi: " Yeah a man's job is to secure the life of his beloved and I can do that physically and financially. "
Sreedevi: "I believe my dad was looking for a husband for me , not a bodyguard"
Shasi: " What i meant was, I have 10 lahks per annum salary and you won't have any financial problems. I will buy you anything you want. You don't have to go for work or anything" 
Sreedevi: "I wanna work. And i am not scared of problems be it financial or anything else "
Shasi: "All right. Well for a jobless girl like you a guy with 10 lakhs per annum salary is a really lucky thing"
Sreedevi: " I thought you knew that I'm placed at an MNC."
Shasi: " But that MNC probably doesnt have a branch at Dubai "
Sreedevi : " What do you mean ?"
Shasi :" You'll have to come to Dubai with me after marriage and as long as they dont have a branch there , you cant work. I am all alone there , I cant handle the housework and job alone...its hard to get good servants there .. "
Sreedevi :"You were looking for a wife so that you dont have to pay a servant "
Shasi: " I didn't mean that ...well a women's job is to take care of their husband..kids ..home ...even if she's working....but when she has a rich husband why must she work ...she'll have more time to spend inside the house "
Sreedevi : " You think work is just for money don't you"
Shasi : "What do you mean?"
Sreedevi : " What I meant is you dont have to waste your time visiting my house today. Goodbye..I hope we never meet again"

She walked into the temple.The air was filled with the sound of the holy rhymes. Sreedevi was devastated , not because she broke a relation even before it started , but because she realized a fact. The fact that one can't really get to know a person while following such traditions.Yeah nowadays there are many ways to communicate,but usually all these communications starts only after the wedding is fixed. Ones its fixed it ain't easy to change the decisions as there are many other people involved. Its not like breaking up with a lover. The lucky ones get the right spouse . But the unlucky ones might end up giving up their dreams and making adjustments. She closed her eyes and wished she would be a lucky enough to get the right spouse. She didn't want to give up her dreams .Work was not just about money for her. She wished that her spouse , whoever he might be , would understand her dreams.He should support her to raise the family instead of having predefined views on "how a women should be" and "how a man should be ". And then she kept of wishing for a long while and weeping in between. The more she thought , the more scared she got about marrying the wrong guy. 

"You've been here for too long ,child " said the temple priest. She opened her eyes and saw the thin old man in white dhoti who has been serving at the temple ever since she was a child. 
" I am  praying " she replied.
" You seem confused and sad " he said " Praying alone won't help you. Only actions can make wishes come true . Now go home and do what you have to do. Do your best and God will take care of the rest" 

She went home and found her dad angry. Shasi had phoned her parents. After Sree explained what happened her dad asked raising  his voice "So you want us to get you married to whoever you fall in love with or are you planning to run away with someone? "

"I wanna marry a guy we both like, dad " she replied "If i meet someone i like , i'll  tell you or if someone proposes to me , i'll  tell you. You can make the final decisions. I wont run away. Nor will i term anyone  "my boyfriend" before i get your permission . The choice is yours. I'm just 21 .Life doesn't end at 21" 

"You are making me confused "  said her dad .

"Will you be happy if i give up my dreams and lead a sad life adjusting to someone else wish? Or will you be happy if I make my dreams come true and live with a man who loves me for what i truly am? " asked the daughter.

And that marked the beginning of a very long complicated conversation....

Talent , Money and Life .....

Not long ago , I accompanied my father on his journey to a remote village , to visit an old artist who had been a friend of my late grandfather. Decades ago , this artist had traveled far and wide promoting temple arts . He owned splendid wealth and lived lavishly during those days. But on the day when we visited him he was bedridden and poor. His health and wealth were at stake. Despite the pathetic conditions ,he spoke . Indeed ,he spoke quite well. He spoke about his ecstatic young days and his gloomy present. 

 Decades ago , he used to spend like a king , but never bothered to buy any assets. He was immensely talented and entertained many. But well ,all kinds of jobs , are restricted to a certain age. Either the rules will restrict it or our health will. In his case , he fell ill one day and became too weak to perform. He became bedridden for years . Each day he grew weaker and poorer. When poverty knocked on his front door , his disciples and servants escaped through the back door. 

Many artists of the by gone  years have meet with a similar fate. Most of them firmly believed in the power of the fate. They should have rather believed in their own powers to control their destinies. If he had managed his wealth a bit more wisely , the end wouldn't have been so bad. Of course death is inevitable . But if he had savings , he wouldn't have suffered so much towards the end. He would have  had something left for his children to inherit.

Most of us are like him.

We are so made that our expenditure always exceeds what we earn (from a job or from our parents). When we get 1000 rs , we spend nearly 1000. And then we'll wish that we had 2000. If in case we somehow get 2000 , our expenditure would rise to 2000. People with such mentalities fail to save . When we fail to save , we often find ourselves in situations that we call "broke" ,"tight" etc. That's okay when we are still depended on our parents. But once we start earning on our own , things will turn bad if we dont quit this habit.

By talking about "savings " I do not wish to point at keeping some raw cash aside. I'd rather like to focus on the art of buying assets ie...money generating properties such as a small amount of gold , a medium sized plot or even a big building. People often consider homes as assets. That's wrong because the house we live in doesn't generate income until its sold. Once its sold ,its no longer our home. Instead if a part of our home is given for rent then it becomes an asset. Cars that constantly need petrol and pets that need food and care aren't assets either. I am not saying that we shouldn't own non-assets , but before we go into buying such luxuries we must own some assets, be it small or big.

We are all talented in some way or the other. And that talent might earn us an income to live. As long as we have notes in our pockets there will be a huge tendency to spend. When that tendency is too much , even millions won't satisfy us .The spending will simple increase with earning and nothing will ever be enough. We must focus on spending for "What we need " rather than for "What we want ". There is a huge difference between the two . Once we understand that difference and save accordingly , then we'll never again have to tell others  that "I'm broke ".

Our destiny is not designed by our talents .The attitude towards life and the decisions we forge ,make us what we are. They say that "money won't make you happy " , but well the modern civilization is so made that without at least a bit more money than what we actually need, its hard to survive .

Adieu....

Four summers ago I believed that I'll be glad the day I leave my college. But this summer as the time has approached for the departure ,what I feel is exactly opposite of what I thought it would be.

I do NOT mean to say that my college was great. It was rather an orthodox place with meaningless rules and restrictions. A part of the faculty was student-phobic , or so we felt by the way they treated us.While some of us cleverly bunked , most students did spend 6 days a week in classrooms trying to grasp the various engineering subjects that were hard to digest. Clearly it wasn't a fun ride .What made this era worth living through were those people we meet here. Between those labs and assignments ; between those ecstatic days like arts and freshers ; between those classrooms and corridors ,we forged relations. Relations of friendship , love, brotherhood and rivalry. And these relations forged memories that we are carrying with us as we leave.

When you've got friends even hell can be fun. An unforgettable Christmas ,3 grand Onam celebrations , the fest's ,the arts days , freshers days ,college days , class tours , and finally a series of farewell functions-they all made it a roller-coaster ride.

The past 4 years has changed us a lot ,especially in the way we view this world. New perspectives evolved and it made our ways of thinking  and speaking step into new dimensions. Old habits , mannerisms and looks gave way for new ones. The innocent teen-minds slowly faded into adulthood..Everyone changed  , in a good or a bad way,greatly influenced by the people around us and the circumstances that we survived through. But the years that bought these changes seemed to have flown away quite fast and now the time has arrived for us to bid goodbye.

It is true that , no matter where we are all are , we shall still be connected through phones and the net .  Hopefully we might even meet once in a while .... somewhere ...somehow. The only difference is that we will no longer meet at that old lobby nor will we stand and chat under those giant mango trees in the frontyard. We'll no longer walk through those echoing corridors nor make nuisance during programs in the auditorium. Never again will we watch from those tall classroom windows , the rain pouring outside while classes are going on inside. Those classrooms will no longer be opened for us. Gone are those days , once and for all.

A state of confusion prevails as now we stand in the crossroads of life. Fortunately a good number of us have  jobs in our hands. Some dames are getting married and settling in life. Many  have decided to go for higher studies ,preferably in better colleges ,while some still struggle to clear papers of previous semesters. For the rest , life after college is nothing but a big question mark.

Lets hope that sooner or later everyone of us will end up somewhere good ,that everyone will have a bright future and that we'll all cherish our college days forever. 

The Concrete Jungle

The reflection of sun rays from the water made an illusion of gems in the river . The wildflowers tilted slowly with the breeze. I sat in the shade reading  peacefully. Except for the chirping of the birds , everything was silent.....Everything was silent until my mother shouted ..." Vidhya ..get up ..just because you don't have class today doesn't mean that you can sleep all day ..." And that marked the end of a pretty good dream.

I got up from bed ,not because I wanted to . The clock told me that it was 9 . My sister and dad had already left for class and work respectively and mom had to leave for her office in half an hour . After my morning rituals,  I helped her pack her lunch and soon waved her goodbye. Then , like all other class-free days , I was home ,alone .

Exams were around the corner, but I've been working on my canvas for the past few days. So as soon as she left , I grabbed my stuffs and went to the upstair-balcony to finish my latest painting.The sun had already begun his summer brutality. Working indoors was more comfortable. But i had the habit of taking short breaks while painting and looking at the green garden in the next yard . That garden was a soothing sight and was the only sign of nature in our urban neighborhood. I live in a large house with very little yard , surrounded on all sides with houses of similar size . These concrete giants are so closely placed that a skilled acrobatic dancer could jump from one terrace to another with ease. There are trees around , but very few and very isolated. I wished I could return to my morning dream.

Minutes later the mobile phone vibrated. It was a forwarded message from my cousin that had caused the vibration. That was odd cause he usually messages in the evening , so I replied " Y so early 2day??" and he answered "no classes ,chechi  :) & no mood 2 study ..plannin on goin 2 our old yard ..havnt been der 4 a long tym"..

"Our old yard ".. Those words brought a lot of memories . When I was a child , I often spend vacations at my aunt's house and used to go play in this yard with my little cousin( Well at that time he was little , now he's thrice my size).A part of the Periyar river flows a few blocks away from this yard. His village is just a couple of hours journey from my city . It is strange how different two places can be despite being just "few hours"apart.

I messaged him " Kanaa...Don't go now. I'll be there before noon. We'll go together, wait till then :)"...

Within no time I called and told dad , locked the house and boarded Aluva bus. Later walked into aunts house and after a 15 minutes walk from there ,found myself at our old yard.

It was not the first time that I've seen this scenery , but well this time it made me think. " You know something Kanna... May be I should settle in a village someday. The climate and the greenery ..its perfect " 

"Are you sure that your gonna be happy with just that "..he asked .

"Well ..no ...I'd like to make a few changed here " I replied " It would be nice if there was a shopping complex near by and an art store where i could get my canvas ,paint and brushes. May be a Library , a few boutiques and more buses on roads . And yeah a good cafe where I could hang out with my friends..and..."

"And how about a branch of KFC or McDonald's" he asked and laughed .

"Yeah that too....wait a minute was that a sarcasum??.." I asked.  He laughed more loudly.

Well I guess different places are meant for different things.

Often the villages are praised for their beauty and the peace they provide and metros get blamed for very many reasons.People migrate in bulks to cities every year and still blame them. None can deny the fact that there are more jobs available in the urban land . As a matter of fact they provide great opportunities for everything , be it bad or good. One can't fearlessly traverse village roads during late hours.As for cities that never sleep ,when sun goes down the streets turn more beautiful with artificial light and life moves on smoothly.

The urban culture has its ups and downs. On one side there is freedom . Freedom to do anything and everything , freedom to talk to anyone , freedom to be anywhere , freedom of choice and freedom of opinions. Some people do misuse the freedom. Well people who are meant to be bad will be bad be it a village or city , it's not due of the things that cities offer . Then there is not much of gender biasing in cities. A surprising fact that i came across during my initial college year at the village of Kalady is the mental images some villages have about 'how a girl should be ' and 'how a guy should be'. Now when i say 'villagers i meet at Kalady; i am not talking about the local citizens but rather about some of my fellow college mates . I do not agree that all villagers are this way , but a lot of them are. "Educated " , they are termed. But education that doesn't open up ones mind , is just a waste of time and money. 

And for the pollution and stuffs like that ...there are more people here and little land hence more pollution. In villages at least each house has some yard to dispose the wastes.

The cacophony of the city , one will love it when one gets used to it.

On certain days any city-dweller might wish to fade away to the silence of the green lands. But once he/she has spend some time  there, their soul start missing the gifts of urban world.

Birds don't survive for long once they have been misplaced in a different habitat. For a city bird like me ,the Concrete Jungle is where i belong......